The Eight Sentences:
The Big Apple was abuzz with more than the usual summer vacation crowds in June of 1976. Claudia Barry walked up to the front desk at the Chelsea Hotel in New York City.
“May I help you?” the slender attendant asked. He was tall and thin and had an uncanny resemblance to Anthony Perkins.
Claudia thought to herself, “God, I hope his name isn’t Bates.”
“I have reservations.”
They completed the paperwork and Norman gave her the key to her room. As she was turning to go to the elevator, he said, “Oh, Miss Berry.”
“It’s ‘Barry.’ Yes? What is it?”
“I almost forgot. There’s a message for you. It came in a few hours before you arrived.”
The Set Up:
Claudia had been on the train from Boston for over four hours. New York City was crowded with the usual summer vacationers multiplied this year by those arriving early in anticipation of the Bicentennial Celebration in a few weeks. It was a great time for her to be in town. She could disappear with ease in the throng.
The morning after she arrived began a personal challenge. She had two self-assignments. First, she wanted to infiltrate the wait staff of the Waldorf Astoria Hotel, and for at least a few hours, become one of them — as a male. It was important for her thesis to show, how using deception, timing, and disguise, she could move in close to important people in spite of security. Second, her next goal would be to disappear from the premises undetected. Her effective use of group dynamics would be put to the test. She’d have to rely on an unplanned diversion to occur — unless she could come up with something on the spur of the minute.
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17 responses to “Claudia Meets Norman Bates”
Iris B
November 5th, 2014 at 03:56
You had me with the title! I’m intrigued.
jtsuruoka
November 4th, 2014 at 17:15
You had me with the title. And the fact that you’re writing about one of my favorite landmarks in one of my favorite parts of the city.
FCEtier
November 4th, 2014 at 17:40
Thanks, Jeff.
Glad you enjoyed the snippet.
historysleuth1
November 4th, 2014 at 11:06
I agree with Sarah. I like that she was creeped out by him. 🙂 Course I bet that changed to being pissed off at his almost forgetting the message!
History Sleuth’s Milk Carton Murders
nicolettehugowriter
November 3rd, 2014 at 03:44
Intriguing and tense….fantastic atmosphere in the snippet!
catherinewinther
November 2nd, 2014 at 22:36
This actually left me feeling very anxious – good hook, I need to read more!
FCEtier
November 4th, 2014 at 17:41
Do you do reviews? I’ll send you a review copy.
chellecordero
November 2nd, 2014 at 21:23
Her paranoia about the task ahead is making her see dangers lurking (Norman Bates at a hotel) or is it simple paranoia, maybe it’s a warning of things. And a message, I don’t assume it’s her thesis. Good set-up for quite a bit of intrigue.
Teresa Cypher
November 2nd, 2014 at 21:07
Chip, I love the reference to Norman Bates. It ups the tension, I think. Your writing–as always, is very fluid. Good 8!
elainecsc2013
November 2nd, 2014 at 15:42
This is the first time Claudia showed any trepidation at all, but then again, she was younger.
katiecorcino
November 2nd, 2014 at 12:52
Hmm…message that came in before she arrived, delivered by a Norman Bates look-alike? I like the set-up and the intrigue. Well done in eight lines!
veronicascott
November 2nd, 2014 at 12:10
Perfect scene to give us the day after Halloween! Very descriptive as always, with a nice touch of humor!
Author Charmaine Gordon
November 2nd, 2014 at 10:53
I’m hoping she doesn’t head for the shower in her room. But no. Too obvious. Terrific creepy and humorous scene. Thanks, Chip.
Frank Fisher
November 2nd, 2014 at 10:05
A message for her before she checks in? That’s creepy. Love the whole resemblance to Norman Bates and Psycho bit.
Sarah W
November 2nd, 2014 at 08:37
So Claudia can be (or could be at this point) weirded out, just like the rest of us? That’s awesome, Chip!
Norman Bates at the Chelsea . . . that’s a whole premise by itself! 🙂
FCEtier
November 4th, 2014 at 17:43
I love it when you write something simple, and readers find much more than originally intended!
Thanks for pointing out the connection with Claudia!
Gem
November 2nd, 2014 at 08:21
Complex story. This scene is very intriguing. I’m hooked!